The Four Dimensions of Friendship.

 The concept of friendship is historical; philosophers in different cultures and epochs have emphasized certain aspects of friendship that others have not. In ancient Greece and Rome, the civic dimension of friendship was prominent as some argued that it was part of the social glue that held societies together. By the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries, however, friendship’s centrality for a good society began to be questioned - such as when Thomas Hobbes challenged the possible socially destabilizing nature of preferential love. Identifying the convergences and divergences in philosophers’ views of friendship is important for understanding its nuances. I wish to look at four philosophical approaches, from Aristotle, Bacon, Lewis, and Hunt. Their writings reveal friendship’s significance and how friends help one another when they are weak or struggling. The need to take friendship seriously as a model for all relationships, based on how friends courageously pursue a common truth together, also emerges. Aristotle (384-322 BC) is Western philosophy’s Mr Friendship. Most scholars would turn to him first for an analysis of the concept. Plato’s Lysis, like his other early dialogues, leaves readers with more questions than answers, including the unchallenged assumption that friends share everything in common. In contrast, Aristotle offers several claims and insights supporting the relevance of friendship for a good life. He begins with unequivocal praise for friendship in his Nicomachean Ethics-. “For without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods” (1155a). Beyond this affirmation, his three types of friendship are useful friends, friends of pleasure, and virtuous friends, and of the three, the latter is the best. This is a relationship where each person loves the other because of his or her good character, and this relationship leads to mutual betterment through deep concern for the friend’s welfare. For Aristotle, continuous personal development plays an important role in living a good life, and friends mutually aid each other to improve their characters, cultivate joy in life and flourish as human beings. In this way, friendship is indispensable to a good life. This stands in stark contrast to contemporary views (such as the TV show Friends) which portray friendship as being mainly about hanging out together with little emphasis on personal growth. Francis Bacon (1561-1626) also thinks friendship a necessary component of life. Drawing on Aristotle in the opening of his essay Of Friendship, he comments that any person existing in solitude is “either a beast or a god.” Bacon ends the essay with a stark statement: when someone enters a period of life where he is unable to carry out needed activities, “ifhe have not a friend, he may quit the stage.” Besides the aid friends offer. Bacon says, there are two other fruits of friendship. The first is the ability of friends to help nurture peace in our emotional lives, and the second is to encourage our good judgment. So friends help one another to become better, stronger people by reducing emotional stress, helping each other to work through difficult decisions, and by doing things that the friend cannot do. Each fruit reinforces the idea that friends mutually uplift one other -that without friendship, people may languish under the burdens of life. In other words, human beings have weaknesses and moments when they cannot succeed by themselves. Friends sustain each other through such moments and their strengths complement each other. C.S. Lewis (1898-1963) approaches things differently; he discusses friendship (philia) alongside the three other Greek words for types of love: eras (romantic, desiring love), agape (love of neighbor, charity), and storge (affection in general, but more specifically, parental love). He directs our attention to the significance of agape as a foundation, but this does not mean he thinks lowly of friendship. Instead, Lewis describes friendship as a type of love between two or more people standing shoulder to shoulder, inspired by, and pursuing, the same truth. Unlike eras, which is jealous, friendship is open to more than one friend; indeed, the more friends we have, the more they bring out our singular gifts. Each friend is unique because he or she can help others to improve in distinctive ways. Instead of friendship isolating people from the rest of the world, Lewis describes friendship as taking each friend beyond the narrow limits of the self: their friendship is grounded in their shared appreciation of a truth, yet this truth is always beyond their full grasp. Friends exist, then, in a process of appreciating and pursuing a common truth. So philia is, arguably, more about the joy of sharing in this experience of pursuit with those we love than it is about the end goal. This would make friendship process-oriented whereby the friends’ growth is nurtured through a shared activity with well-matched values. Unlike Lewis, who grounds friendship in agape, Mary E. Hunt (b.l951) elevates friendship into a model and goal for life. With romantic love’s difficulties and marriage’s failures. Hunt argues that a new relational goal is needed. No longer should the aim be romantic relationships grounded in marriage. This does not mean these relationships are insignificant or should be eliminated, but that they should grow out of friendship and be shaped by its values and orientations. Hunt associates friendship fierce tenderness. Her analysis includes a focus on embodiment, which emphasizes the physiological dimensions of relationships; spirituality, which emphasizes deep interconnections with others and the world; love, which emphasizes emotions and commitments; and power, which emphasizes the strength to alter the world and others. This idea of friendship’s fierce, tender side is important because friendship becomes political. It is not simply between two people in isolation; instead, friendship exceeds the private sphere and may be a vehicle through which social change is possible. Friends can unite and encourage each other to take a stand against injustices and to work for peace in the world. Think of the friendship between Ehzabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony. With friendship as a goal and the leading relational model. Hunt urges readers to see life in a new way. Friendship is the lens through which we can examine and reimagine private and public relationships, professions, and life. No matter what we are doing, the concept of friendship should play an important role in how we think and act. Fve highlighted four different approaches to friendship. Each author has a different angle and different priorities. Character development and friendship’s centrality for a life lived well are important for Aristotle. Friends helping friends in challenging moments is crucial for Bacon. The pursuit of a common truth and the non-jealous inclusivity of friendship are important for Lewis. Being both courageous and tender in friendship and using friendship as the relational model are crucial for Hunt. By bringing these different emphases together, friendship can be seen as a type of relationship dedicated to helping others cultivate their best self even when the odds may not be in their favor. Courageously, with receptiveness and tender attentiveness, friends uplift one another to overcome life’s burdens. By using friendship as a new way for seeing, thinking about, and acting in the world, the various relationships in which we engage could be transformed.